xx××°•´diGiTaL•°×X×°•DiSdAiN•°xx ^¥^
okay
maybe
i
AM
be
coming
a
neo-luddite
the less engagement with
the
the
my disilusionment
i DO still enjoy certain places
BUT
other spaces annoy the ever loving--
...fuck did i spend SO much time on reddit?!
i guess that answer is:
sober i can't STAND the place
even the fediverse
has lost
it's original lustre
i think it's a matter of
you're just one more anon
in a sea of anonyminity
sure
we're anon here too
but it's more intimate
like
seeing the same person at the bus stop
i may not know you
but we're familar
feel each other's
it's why i loved small forums
in the early aughts
cozy
anyway
i digress
my disdain grows
but my fondness for the
small,
cozy places
grows
online
as well as
in the world
i guess it's a return
to the original promise the web offered:
a more connected world
BUT
the onus is on US
to make the right
gemini://wolfinthewoods.pollux.casa/
Replies
unqualified/un-described
everything is perfectly
what it is
why limit it to
dualistic qualification/description
and pretend the
qualification/description
is what it is?
in other words
why take the
cave wall shadows
to be
the reality?
before leaving Twitter in Sept 2019, I always assumed/sorta knew I was legitimately pathalogically addicted to it. I figure "addiction, but not chemical - so not the same or as severe, right?". I was wrong. I found the following months to be just as significantly difficult (with time, habits, urge - though not a physical detox, obviously) as it had been with quitting booze or amphetamines as a teenager. I had a brief addiction to video games when I was 20 - played them constantly, ever 15 mins I would want to sit down and fill a void with some gameplay. This lasted only six months, so I didn't have much memory of "going away" from a digital addiction. After 10 years on Twitter, I knew I would have to make sincere and authentic mental shifts to leave/stay away from it. It wasn't a "take it or leave it thing" like I assumed/presumed it to be in 2009/2010 - use a thing, ANY thing, multiple times a day, every day, years on-end, a decade plus, and it's gonna form into an addiction.
What was neat/good about leaving (or fascinating, initially) was how I was changing HOW I was thinking about things. Like my brain was re-routing to ways it had not done in many years. I used to think in a "set pattern" about things, all things, in life. And then as time (months, a year or more) went on, I saw the "unshakable" views/perceptions I had of the world alter to be different - some (most) more positive/optimistic, some even more realist and pessemistic - but more akin to HOW my brain worked and how I AM in the world au naturale - not a digital dependency having pre-dominant influence over it (my ways of seeing/being in the world).
anyway, things get better - takes time, legwork, et al. But all better int he end :)
stay well, wolf