Protocols on the web you may spy,
Are HTTP, gopher, gemini.
You may also see QUIC,
Run off from you NIC,
But to be useful all need a URI.

Zimmerman, of PGP, he did say,
That it protects comms using crypto (RSA).
But it is hard to use,
Its command line will bemuse,
But Johnny can't encrypt anyway!

TLS encrypts your port
(Assuming you're a careful sort.)
Even if the verse you spell
Is quickly written doggerel,
Eve's machinations you will thwart.