< Would you rub the crystal ball?

~inquiry

> One of the recurring thoughts is a
> question: if you had a crystal ball
> that could tell me the exact date I
> would die, would you choose to rub
> it and get the answer?

Only if it came with a certificate of authenticity so I could finally say to others hellbent on wasting my time something like, "Um, I'd love to join you in that obvious-to-anyone-with-half-a-brain time waste, but as you can see <points vigorously and exuberantly at certificate>, I don't have nearly enough time to be blowing on <whatever someone else thinks might end the world if not accomplished immediately over the next half of forever>!"

You know?

> My long-term anxiety sees every month
> as less than guaranteed. Sometimes
> I can't even take a week for
> granted. If I had the ball, all
> I would have to do is ask, and
> know whether or not my anxiety is
> well-founded...but doing so puts a
> countdown on the rest of my life,
> regardless of whether the answer is
> in 6 weeks or 6 decades.

You've heard of the thief in the night, right? They could arrive before your next blink. I suspect remembering that ends countdown anxiety, the message being something like "Be here and now every here and now, 'kay?"

> And I'm not sure whether not knowing
> or knowing too much is the greater
> curse. They say there's bliss in
> ignorance, but nobody mentions the
> fear and worry in ignorance, either.

There's no fear/worry in the kind of profound ignorance referenced by that phrase. Yours must be some lesser, half-assed ignorance. Find a way to put both cheeks into it.

Kidding.

Sorta.

(Actually, I think the ignorance referenced by that phrase comes part and parcel with/in so-called "abiding in awareness" - as opposed to embracing the web of chains that might be described as "re-presentation-as-though-re-al". One must ignore(ance) the endless, descending fractal slope of conceptuality by turning awareness back upon itself, resting dumber-than-a-box-of-rocks blissful therein. But keep in mind that one drop of un-ignorance (i.e. a smidgen of a notion/concept) and it's blissful game over....)

(Also, "keep in mind" is bad advice, because the goal is absence of mind... but here we are seemingly in mind, so of course we're going to re-ference it as though re-al....)

<gurgling sounds>

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