Binary thinking about hobbies

I've written before about maybe potentially wanting to quit music:

I'm wrestling with that again. I've been dissociating my way through my last couple band practices for one of my groups, including a particularly bad instance of derealization in the one two weeks ago where I suddenly returned to my body after a period of being on autopilot. I've been a bit dissatisfied with my band leader, since she tends to need time to remember how to play her own songs, which ideally she'd be ready for before rehearsal.

I'm also continuing to struggle with the location issue. Bars are hard for me. Particularly with groups, where I can't supplement my hearing with lip-reading very well, I have to spend so much time parsing what is being said that the conversation moves on before I've had time to add anything to it. The result is that I'm often pretty quiet. It's not a very satisfying means of socializing. I've had the thought that while gaming didn't satisfy from the in-person socializing perspective, the use of voice chat apps allowed me to manually set volumes that made it easy for me to follow everyone in the group conversation. Thus, it was easier to participate in the chat.

So, I'm thinking of quitting music.

But, I'm noticing that I think of that in a really binary way. *quitting* music, not just reducing my involvement. I quit video games a while back - fully sold my gaming PC and everything. I haven't played Counter-Strike in 3? years. I'm thinking similar about music - sell my guitars, my drums, my audio equipment. Focus on writing or drawing or software instead. It feels freeing to not have all that stuff taking up space, and not needing to maintain skill at the instruments I play in groups. It feels almost like I think that because I'm involved in music, I must be fully committed, regularly practicing and with everything I need.

There's no need for that, though. I didn't need to fully quit games; I could've just played less. I don't need to fully quit music, I can just leave the group that I'm dissatisfied with and let go of the idea of getting significantly better at any of my instruments. I think the reason I think in this binary way is that I feel like if I'm going to do something, it becomes part of my identity, so I must commit. I need to learn to divorce my sense of self from the things I do. I need to not build my identity from being good at things.